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Lackluster
Well that about sums up my total outlook these days.
I can't pinpoint exactly what is making me so damn apathetic, lethargic and somewhat bitchy.
From what my apathetic soul can ascertain it is a myriad of things that have accumulated to induce this lackluster approach to life.
It all sort of started with The Birthday.
The Birthday that brings me one year closer to that age that starts with 4. I had a hard time with it, I wanted to avoid it, but the son of a bitch happened anyway. I don't know why this year bothered me so much, ok I lie, I have a few good ideas as to why and it may or may not have something to do with my fucking biological clock.
Then there is the weather. We have had a distinct lack of nice weather. By this I mean actual Spring! We are still blanketed with snow and encompassed with cold mother freaking weather. You know the kind that begs for you to stay in bed, huddled under the shelter of the covers. I yearn for sandals, shaved legs and the warmth of the sun on my face as I sit in my back yard.....*sigh*
Work seems to be another major 'issue'; apparently I have so much time on my hands that I am 'able' to do the workload of 4 people for the same salary as 1. This of course causes me to be extremely enthusiastic about going to work!
Oh and we must not forget the back!! The back with the L4, L5 issue that makes my ass feel like someone has it stuck in a vise. I have been taking Ibuprofen and muscle relaxants so often that I consider them their own food group.
Then at the depth of my fight with the depression demon, there has been light. Light filled with friendship, warmth and compassion from places I would never have imagined.
These unexpected gifts warmed me to the very core of my being and affected me in so many ways that I cannot even begin to explain.
So I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for helping me see the light in the darkness, just by being you.
You guys know who you are, and your friendship means more to me that you will ever know.
Smooches!!
I can't pinpoint exactly what is making me so damn apathetic, lethargic and somewhat bitchy.
From what my apathetic soul can ascertain it is a myriad of things that have accumulated to induce this lackluster approach to life.
It all sort of started with The Birthday.
The Birthday that brings me one year closer to that age that starts with 4. I had a hard time with it, I wanted to avoid it, but the son of a bitch happened anyway. I don't know why this year bothered me so much, ok I lie, I have a few good ideas as to why and it may or may not have something to do with my fucking biological clock.
Then there is the weather. We have had a distinct lack of nice weather. By this I mean actual Spring! We are still blanketed with snow and encompassed with cold mother freaking weather. You know the kind that begs for you to stay in bed, huddled under the shelter of the covers. I yearn for sandals, shaved legs and the warmth of the sun on my face as I sit in my back yard.....*sigh*
Work seems to be another major 'issue'; apparently I have so much time on my hands that I am 'able' to do the workload of 4 people for the same salary as 1. This of course causes me to be extremely enthusiastic about going to work!
Oh and we must not forget the back!! The back with the L4, L5 issue that makes my ass feel like someone has it stuck in a vise. I have been taking Ibuprofen and muscle relaxants so often that I consider them their own food group.
These unexpected gifts warmed me to the very core of my being and affected me in so many ways that I cannot even begin to explain.
So I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for helping me see the light in the darkness, just by being you.
You guys know who you are, and your friendship means more to me that you will ever know.
Smooches!!
